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 The Hilarity of Hypocrisy 

June 9, 2007
by Keith Simerson

Way back when I was in the sixth grade, my sister, who was in the third grade, missed one day of school that year, but boy did she really make that day count. While I was at school, my dear sweet sick sis contented herself by wiling away her day, rummaging through my personal toy chest. Her search, I assume, was for one of my toys since she must have bored from playing with her myriad of playthings. What she happened upon that day was my secret stash of girlie pictures that I had been collecting since discovering a pile of adult books in the nearby woods that someone had disposed of for some unknown reason. Her amazing stroke of good luck in getting her hands on something this valuable that would certainly get her big brother in deep trouble with mom and dad was more than she could take. Instead of using her new found discovery as a bargaining chip which she could have used to her advantage with the veiled threat of exposure about my secret image library, she opted out and went straight for my jugular vein and with glee took them directly to mom.

Upon returning from school, I was met by mom with this statement, "When your dad gets home, I am going to show him your collection of dirty pictures that your sister found today! I don't know what to do with you! What's wrong with you?!"

I began to quickly think of possible responses to that question as mom glared at me waiting for an answer. Well, right off the bat it was apparent what was wrong with me; I had an extremely nosy sister that was desperately attempting to get me in trouble! That was for starters. However, I knew that would not get me anywhere, so I shrugged my shoulders and claimed ignorance of my personal sins and went outside to wait on dad's return and my inevitable punishment.

It never came.

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When dad was informed of my grotesque sins he responded to mom that boys will be boys and to drop it. I guess that he figured that I had been embarrassed enough knowing that mom knew that I was guilty of the aforementioned charges. Either that or else he could not bring himself to punish me when he knew that I knew that he was guilty of the same offenses. How blatantly hypocritical would it have been if he had punished me?

This was what I thought about when I read James Rothenberg's article, "Hypocrisy Abounds: The Show Must Go On" at http://www.disinformation.com/. He was talking about the hypocrisy in our modern day slogans and political decisions. I thought about the vanity of going into another country, claiming that they possess WMD's (Weapons of Mass Destruction) when you possess thousands yourself. I thought about the hypocrisy of not allowing soldiers and airmen to write the word "Fuck" on an airplane but allowing that same plane to drop a incendiary bomb and burn everything in its path (Col. Walter E. Kurtz). When we are told that this is going to be a long war, what they really mean is that we are to endure all of the invasions of our privacy and not say or do anything under the guise of national security.

Every ounce of respect or loyalty that I have ever mustered for anyone has originated from their being honest with me. There is not much that I ask from a friend or a leader. I just want to know where I stand ... that's basically all I care about. I may not understand or even like you but if you are straight up with me and what you are doing, I'll respect you for it.

Actually, I don't think that hypocrisy is funny ... what I think is hilarious is when leaders believe that lies and deceptions are the key ingredients for effective leadership of the same people that they demand truth and honor from or else run the risk of being branded unpatriotic.

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Keith Simerson [send him email] is a self-employed foundryman and sculptor as well as an Air Force veteran in the security field.  See his website at www.stonereproductionworks.com

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