October 9, 2007
by Volt and Electra Penn

Ever wonder what happened to Dr. Frank-n-furter' from Rocky Horror's late night picture show? It seems that the Furter wasn't thrown out with the trash, but instead has resurfaced in the U.K. mail, still in drag, but minus the pearl choker. Oh, but wait, that's not Furter in the news. That's Debra Cagan, who masquerades as one of W's foreign policy advisors, while pretending to be Deputy Assistant Secretary for Coalition Affairs to Defense Secretary Robert Gates.

Catch up with Cagan here

It used to be that when it looked like a dog, smelled and barked like a dog, then it was a dog, and since dogs attract dogs, it looks likely the whole capitol pack has gone to the dogs. But hey, if Cagan did lob off his furter to become a she, then the Republican Party's newest Broke Back fence straddler has no inhibitions left to throw to the dogs. She's likely to say or do just about anything.  Anybody got a muzzle? 

Ms. Cagan, who seems proud of her four eyebrows that move in opposition, really should check out if she's a long lost relative of Jay Leno. I recommend her plastic surgeon chisel a few inches off that chin, maybe that would tighten up the iron jaw. And while we're at it-I mean at her, when viewing the link posted above, watch out. That sparkly throat-collar thing tries to drag you down under. What's hiding beneath that red bulletproof Saran Wrap coat could drive a body rabid.

I usually don't gossip, but it's hard to take a person seriously when she allows herself to be photographed wearing a hair-helmet coiffure by Iggy Punk. Sir Punk named the particular style 'War Ready, Death Willing'. In addition, the story goes that Cagan's wardrobe was constructed by Christo's second cousin twice removed, Mr. Jocko. This was another unfortunate choice, since by now everybody's seen, copied or thrown to the wind Michael Jackson's Thriller video with him moonwalking in Mr. Jocko's ready-to-wear. And about the Olympic-size Iron Maiden Cross weighing down Cagan's neck. It was lifted from Adolph Shickelgruber's Pawn Shop, and is a Bushie Award for 1st Trans-gender survivor to possess a mouth dirtier than her butt.

Okay, maybe it was a bad hair day, but it didn't have to be a bad mouth day. Observations of goings on in the photo tell us little about this guy?ah, gal Cagan, for one thing she's got a very stiff upper lip. From that mouth made of fleshy looking inner-tubs carefully outlined to cover a five o'clock overhang, came words of iconoclastic bigotry based on absolutely no intelligent thinking. Cagan should have had a brain transplant along with the sex change. Why would anybody in a high position undiplomatically proclaim to Britain's MP's that, "I hate all Iranians"? Can she/he/it say anything stupider?

I don't know about you folks, but the situation inside George Bush's beltway looks totally unbuckled, since a prerequisite for government employment is that first-most and foremost a candidate must exhibit cast-iron hatred. But Debra Cagan was hired by 'we the people', to work for 'we the people' and to be the voice of 'we the people'. As our representative, she's supposed to convey what we cannot. If part of her paycheck comes from my taxes, then that Cagan laddie/lassie sure as hell isn't speaking for me.

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Since this Cagan person was a state employee before the NeoCon takeover and was involved in subverting nuclear non-proliferation issues, then it makes me wonder if she may be the much quoted 'senior official speaking on the basis of anonymity' who keeps leaking Iranian misinformation and beating the drum to bomb Iran.

Here's the bottom line folks. Nobody should give a ho-hum damn what a governmental employee looks like, what color hair they have, whether they're a man, a woman, or some take-a-guess gender. Our only question should be, are they doing and saying the 'right thing' for 'we the people'? If the answer to that question is a 'negative' then call Waste Management because it's time to throw out the garbage, along with any other trash currently inhabiting 'we the people's' house.

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Have Penn they'll listen. Volt Penn writes speeches for Progressive Populists and reasoned arguments for those on the left of center. He has also written speeches for anybody who has read his work. You can reach Volt Penn through his artist friend, b.b.kemp, at bbkemp@bbkemp.com

Volt/Electra Penn copyright ?07