November 9, 2007
by Victoria Hardy

I have spent my days exploring the news. I used to long to make sense of all things, but I have found peace in not knowing - and I have accepted that the search is enough.  In my travels I run into all modes of weirdness and I often have to step outside and allow the sun to burn the sliminess off of my psychic skin.  Our world is an odd place, some say we are gazing into the end and now is the time to prepare, not by hoarding arms and money, but by seeking peace and forgiveness.  I don't profess to have the answers, but I think there is more truth to that idea, than not. 

There are many subjects that call to me, begging to be examined, but I am learning the hard way, which need to be taken and embraced, and which need to be left alone.  Some subjects have such sticky underbellies it takes me days to recover and others just leave a dark funk in my mind.  I often wonder why we are so divided and sick and I also understand a pill doesn't exist to cure what ails us. 

We have become an angry nation, full of pain, illness and fear.  And when I speak of illness I'm not speaking of cancer, diabetes, MS, Alzheimer's or any other number of medically diagnosis-able disorders, nor am I speaking from the aspect of mental health.  I am talking about our spirit, the wrongness that exists in our land and the disconnection from the divine.

Some may say it's the chemtrails, it's the additives, the fluoride, the vaccines, the aspartame, WiFi, TV, anti-depressants, etc., that are closing our pipeline to God, but I am going to suggest that it may be a choice.  It seems we, in America, always look outside of ourselves to blame, it's the government's fault, or religion, or politics, or the elite, or the terrorists, or the atheists, or the Satanists, or the Christians, Muslims or Jews, but really, what if it's our fault? 

What if it really only boils down to free will and personal decisions?  I see so many trying to convince others that their dark view of the world is truth and a few are quite successful, but what if when we embrace another's ideas and stop seeking, we have made a clear choice to accept their perception as our reality?  In effect, we are changing our own path, to live in a world of someone else's making. 

I also see many attempting to explain that God does not exist, Jesus was a myth and that faith is a deception, only the ignorant and uneducated still believe those lies.  And a lot of folks accept this without hesitation and then wonder what has gone wrong with our world.  I am not a fan of big religions, giant churches and the mindset that often seems to go with them, but I do find peace when connecting with God. 

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We live in a world that broadcasts murder, fear, destruction, chaos, sex and war, with a smattering of laughter, music and applause, 24/7.  These images are pumped into our brains, informing us what is normal, what is fair, what is just and what is moral.  We have learned there is no spirit, there is no God and the truth is what the box tells us it is, it appears we have forgotten that we have choices. 

We have been taught that to fit in with today's educated masses we must shun faith, or else we may look like a fool.  We have learned that if we discuss faith with our co-workers, we may lose our job.  And our children understand that they can't discuss faith in school and even a moment of silence is now considered potential religious interference.  We can, however, choose to unlearn these ideas and we can decide to make different choices.  But choices and change go hand in hand and few of us volunteer to have our lives changed and even less of us want to stand out as a freak or a weirdo, it's so much easier to keep our heads down, avoiding attention and scrutiny.

One of the few things I am sure of in this life is that there is more to existence than the materialistic, money driven, shallow grind we now find ourselves living.  Many are being worn down by the acceleration, the expectations and the constant media blitz informing us of one more product we "must" have and one more thing we "must" achieve. 

And when we are exhausted, at the end of our rope and we seek to gain strength from a higher source, the media has done a fine job of handing us religious leaders that seem to be walking caricatures.  Luckily for us, though, when we turn our back on the slick, polished and shady evangelists, the pharmaceutical companies have created an abundance of pills to numb the longing.

What I know to be truth is that the longing to connect with God is real.  I have heard many say that the whole idea of God is an illusion, brainwashing and a deception or perhaps, even, a case of mental illness.  But for me, I'd rather live in my crazy world where God is present, than the sane one where the media and their flashing box is King. 

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Victoria Hardy [send her email] is the drummer for the pop duo 3 Feet Up. She lives in North Carolina with her husband, who is also the other half of the duo and they have just released their second CD, entitled i will fear no evil.  3 Feet Up was featured in the Living Room Live Series on the CBS Early Show in July of 2006.  Find more on her website, http://www.3feetup.com.